


No Matter The Cost

by angelus2hot



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Gen, Gen Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-21
Updated: 2010-03-21
Packaged: 2017-10-15 02:16:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/155978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelus2hot/pseuds/angelus2hot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean wants to get his brother back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Matter The Cost

**Author's Note:**

> **Title:** No Matter The Cost  
>  **Rating:** PG  
>  **Word Count:** 1,152  
>  **Characters/Pairing:** Dean and Sam Winchester  
>  **A/N:** For smut_slut who asked for Sam/Dean fic set after Sam dies with him as a ghost. From this meme [Here](http://angelus2hot.livejournal.com/60602.html)

Dean had survived a lot of things in his life, his mother’s murder, his father’s death and attacks from demons galore. But the loss of Sammy was the one thing he didn’t think he could survive. A hole had opened up in his chest where his heart used to be and Dean couldn’t imagine a way that he would ever be whole again without Sammy.

He had always told Sammy that he was a pain in his ass and even though on most occasions that was true, his brother had also kept him grounded, kept him sane. There’s nothing that he wouldn’t do for Sammy. He would even die for him. That’s why his brother’s death was such a shock. If he had been asked to take his place he would have gladly done it.

But life didn’t work out that way. Sammy was the one that had gotten killed and he was the one left behind. Dean still had a hard time trying to understand why his brother was the one taken and he was the one always being left.

After Sammy had been killed, Bobby had tried to talk him into giving Sammy a hunter’s burial. He said that Sam deserved it and Dean agreed with him. But he just couldn't do it; he couldn’t bear to let his brother go.

Not yet.

Not ever.

Instead they'd laid him on the bed in the cabin and he'd sat there for hours, staring at Sammy’s body, trying to come to terms with his brother's passing. Sammy looked so peaceful lying there almost as if he was only asleep and would wake up at any moment. But Dean knew better. His brother, his best friend, his everything was gone.

With loss comes regret. And Dean regretted a lot of things.

One of the main regrets he had was that he and Sam had never discussed their feelings. Oh, Sam had tried but he had always come up with some reason or another not to. Mainly, he would just tell Sammy he was being a girl and he didn't want to discuss it. Now he'd give anything just to be able to tell his brother how very much he meant to him.

Loss also brings hate. And Dean hated.

He hated the demon that had started all of it, the guy that had killed his brother, the God that let him die but most of all he hated himself for not being there in time to save his baby brother. Bobby kept trying to convince him that sometimes these things just happen but Bobby didn't understand. It was his job to look after Sammy and he'd let him down.

"How long do you plan to sit around moping?"

Dean almost fell out of his chair as his brother's voice came from behind him. He turned around and his mouth fell open at the sight of his Sammy standing before him.

A wave of relief washed over Dean, almost causing his knees to buckle. “You’re back.” It wasn’t a question or even a statement. It was a relief.

He couldn’t believe his luck. His prayers or whatever it was that he’d been doing were answered. Dean could’ve had a lot of questions but the truth was he didn’t care about any of it: his brother was back. That was all that mattered.

“First things first. We’ve got to let Bobby know. And then, we’re going to pick up that bastard’s trail.” He was going to teach that son of a bitch that you didn’t mess with his baby brother.

“Dean, what are you talking about?”

Dean stared at Sammy with a confused expression on his face. “I didn’t think you’d want to stick around here. Do you?” Maybe he was wrong. He’d never died and come back. Sammy probably needed a few days to get back to himself.

Sam shook his head. “No. I don’t want you to stay here.”

“Then what, Sammy? I don’t understand. What do you want to do?”

Sam would give anything not to have to say these words to his brother, to be able to stay with Dean. There was so much he wanted to tell his big brother. So much he needed to say. But he wouldn’t get the chance. "I can't stay, Dean."

"What the hell are you talking about? Why not?"

Sam shook his head sadly as his heart broke. He could stand a lot of things but Dean’s pain wasn’t one of them. His brother was in worse shape than he'd thought if he had failed to recognize what he’d become. "Dean, look at me! Look what I’ve become. I'm a ghost. If I try to stay you know what will happen. I'll become the very thing that we hunt. That you hunt."

Dean swallowed past the lump in his throat. Damn! He had been so relieved to see his brother that he hadn’t even noticed he was a ghost. Quickly, he glanced at the bed, where his brother’s body lay still and cold, and he was convinced. But Sammy stood before him with a sad smile that pulled at the corners of his mouth. With one shrug of his shoulders Dean made his decision. He was willing to take his brother any way he could get him. Even if that meant Sam was a ghost. Tears filled Dean’s eyes as he looked at his brother. “We’ll figure out something.”

“Dean, I just told you that I can’t stay.” Even though Dean had never been the let’s hug and share our feelings type of guy, Sam wanted to hold his brother and take away the anguish that his words had caused him. But he couldn’t

“Then what, Sammy? Why are you here?”

“I wasn’t supposed to be but I couldn’t leave without telling you goodbye. And you have to know not to blame yourself. This wasn’t your fault. None of it was. You are the best big brother that I could’ve ever hoped to have.”

Tears fell from Dean’s eyes as he listened to Sammy. He wished there was some way his brother could be whole again but he had never heard of a ghost being brought back to life before. He wasn’t even sure a demon could..... Suddenly, he knew what he had to do. "I'll get you back, Sammy. If it's the last thing I do, I'll get you back."

Sammy’s mouth fell open into a perfect shocked O shape. Surely, Dean wouldn’t do what he thought he would do. Of course he would. But he couldn’t let his brother do that. He wasn’t worth Dean risking his soul. “Dean, don’t. Please.”

"I have to, Sammy. I can't survive without you. I won't." Dean ignored the stunned look that crossed his brother's ghostly countenance, grabbed his keys and headed out the door. He was getting his brother back no matter what the cost.


End file.
